5 Months Ago

It’s been almost 6 years since we lost our first little one and only 5 months since we lost our sweet girl.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I should be 34 weeks pregnant and preparing her room in our new home, but I’m not. We should be eagerly awaiting her arrival.  But we’re not.  And we could have a new baby within the next month if she came early like K did.

Even though we lost her when I was only 9 weeks pregnant I loved every bit of this sweet baby and longed to hold her in my arms…and still do. I started wondering whether it was a boy or girl, thinking about names, and planning the theme for his/her room as soon as we found out we were pregnant.  This pregnancy was something we prayed for and longed for, for so long.

I struggle to have a positive perspective but we have an amazing amount to be thankful for and I have to remember that!! Through all of this I’ve learned to not take the little things for granted and truly appreciate ALL of the moments we have with K. It makes me so grateful that we have her and makes me not want to miss a. single. moment. Every one of her firsts could be the “last first” so I make the most of those moments and thank God every day for her. I know He loves her even more than I do and for that I’m thankful!

With Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month upon us, I encourage you to reach out to someone you know who has lost their sweet child. Encourage her, hug her, ask her about their sweet baby, ask how she’s doing.  And really ask and then wait and listen. She’ll appreciate it.  I promise.

Just because that baby isn’t here with us today, that baby is still a huge part of her life.  Don’t take your kiddos for granted and love on them as often as you can!

(((hugs))) to my fellow loss moms.  I’m thinking about you and praying for you!



3 thoughts on “5 Months Ago

  1. I cry for you and Derek. More importantly, I pray for you. You can try to be happy every day. Attitude is “everything” and yes you have a lot to be thankful for. However, it’s ok to grieve for as long as you need to.


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